The 3rd Alternative

by Stephen R. Covey

Personal Growth Leadership personal success stress management motivational personal finance decision making negotiating business parenting investing history fitness dieting word wise enabled english language store problem solving motivation conflict resolution relationships conflict management dysfunctional relationships health

Published in:: 2011
Rating:: 4.5

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It’s not your way, and it’s not my way. It’s a higher way.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Synergy is what happens when one plus one equals ten or a hundred or even a thousand.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Synergy is not only the answer to human conflict; it is also the principle that underlies the creation of every truly new thing in the world.

-- Stephen R. Covey

The most important power we have is the power to help select the lens through which we see reality.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Like the need for air, the greatest psychological need of a human being is to be understood and valued.

-- Stephen R. Covey

It's not your way, and it's not my way. It's a higher way.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Synergy is not just resolving a conflict—it transcends the conflict. We go beyond it to something new, something that excites everyone with fresh promise and transforms the future.

-- Stephen R. Covey

The map we see determines what we do, and what we do determines the results we get.

-- Stephen R. Covey

If you’re not deliberately engaged in positive synergy, you might find yourself trapped in negative synergy.

-- Stephen R. Covey

I see you as a human being, not just a representative of your ‘side.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Compromise breeds satisfaction, but not delight. Synergy means everyone wins.

-- Stephen R. Covey

If you’re in an argument, stop arguing and start listening. If you feel the overwhelming need to be 'right,' postpone that for a while and just listen.

Compassion sensitizes you to the individuality and vulnerability of your loved ones. It makes you see that your wife is a different person from you, with a separate set of experiences, a different temperament, different vulnerabilities, and in some respects, different values.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Empathy—a determination to seek out and truly understand the opposition—is the first requirement of a peacemaker.

-- Stephen R. Covey

There is always a better way.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Whenever we hear that there are only 2 Alternatives, we smell a false dilemma and get excited to move on to a 3rd Alternative.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Two people who see things differently can synergize, and for them, one plus one can equal three or ten or a thousand.

-- Stephen R. Covey

All conflict is laden with emotion. What you might think of as a simple issue is actually tied to deep fears and aspirations.

-- Stephen R. Covey

If school doesn’t do the job of helping young people feel successful every day, they will find other providers of success.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Our peace of mind depends on extending the hand of peace to others.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Life is a mission and not a career. And not a vacation.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Nothing defuses the negative energy of a conflict faster than to say, ‘You see things differently. I need to listen to you.’ And mean it.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Conflict is a sign of life. Thoughtful people will always differ.

-- Stephen R. Covey

According to the law of synergy, there is always a better way.

-- Stephen R. Covey

The best environment for finding the 3rd Alternative is a ‘Magic Theater’ where all possibilities are on the table and nobody judges.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Genius is not required, just a willingness to see what everybody has seen and think what nobody has thought.

-- Stephen R. Covey

We are no longer units on an organizational chart. We connect as human beings or we do not connect at all.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Synergy begins at the edges.

-- Stephen R. Covey

In the space between provocation and anger, I decide who I am and the kind of person I want to be.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Sameness is not oneness, and uniformity is not unity.

-- Stephen R. Covey

When you really listen to others in depth until they feel understood, you are communicating how much they mean to you.

-- Stephen R. Covey

You can’t bring permanent solutions in from outside.

-- Stephen R. Covey

There are no insoluble conflicts.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Live life in crescendo: Your most important work is always ahead of you.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Life is a mission—not a career or a vacation.

-- Stephen R. Covey

The Third Alternative is not about winning or compromise; it’s about creating something entirely new, together.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Synergy is not about my way or your way—it’s about finding a better way.

-- Stephen R. Covey

When people feel understood, trust grows, walls fall, and collaboration begins.

-- Stephen R. Covey

An abundance mentality opens you to a world where solutions are not limited—they’re created.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Compromise means everyone loses something; synergy means everyone wins.

-- Stephen R. Covey

Synergy means everyone wins.

-- Stephen R. Covey

When empathy enters the room, resistance gives way to understanding and cooperation.

-- Stephen R. Covey

When people feel empathically understood, their hearts are satisfied and their minds become open.

-- Stephen R. Covey

When specific techniques and skills are applied, it becomes possible to generate new ideas in any field.

-- Stephen R. Covey

The Transition Point
The 3rd Alternative
The 3rd Alternative at Work
The 3rd Alternative at Home
The 3rd Alternative at School
The 3rd Alternative and the Law
The 3rd Alternative in Society
The 3rd Alternative in the World
A 3rd Alternative Life
Inside Out