Use the BEGIN–RELATE–INTERVIEW–ECHO–FEEDBACK sequence to keep talks calm and effective. Begin peacefully to avoid defensiveness; briefly relate to show you get the feeling without centering yourself; interview for specifics (“He texts me every day after school”); echo to validate (“It sounds like he’s pretty needy right now”); then offer feedback as options, not orders. In family‑friend tangles, buy time by socializing adults only (“I’ll say I need a kid break”), set a dignity rule for shared events, and coach the child to replace ghosting with a clear, polite no; expect short‑term discomfort, but anticipate fewer flare‑ups and faster boundary learning.