Descriptive Praise Over Criticism

The book advocates for descriptive praise instead of evaluative praise. Descriptive praise involves the adult describing what they see or feel, allowing the child to internalize and praise themselves. For example, instead of saying, 'Jill, you’re terrific,' a parent might say, 'You figured out that the cans of corn on sale—the three-for-a-dollar ones—are actually more expensive than the brands that aren’t on sale. I’m impressed.' This method helps children become more aware and appreciative of their own strengths, fostering a more genuine and lasting sense of self-worth. 'Helpful praise actually comes in two parts: The adult describes with appreciation what he or she sees or feels. The child, after hearing the description, is then able to praise himself.'