Miller delves into the concept of the 'False self,' a persona developed to meet external expectations and gain approval, often at the cost of one's True self. This False self is characterized by perfectionism, a fragile self-esteem, and a denial of one's True feelings. For example, an actor may feel a sense of almightiness during a successful performance but wake up the next day feeling empty and futile if his happiness was rooted in the need for external validation rather than genuine creative expression. Miller asserts, 'A False self that has led to the loss of the potential True self' is a common ground between grandiosity and depression. This underscores the importance of recognizing and dismantling the False self to reconnect with one's True self. | Alice Miller | The Drama of the Gifted Child

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The False Self and Its Consequences

Miller delves into the concept of the 'False self,' a persona developed to meet external expectations and gain approval, often at the cost of one's True self. This False self is characterized by perfectionism, a fragile self-esteem, and a denial of one's True feelings. For example, an actor may feel a sense of almightiness during a successful performance but wake up the next day feeling empty and futile if his happiness was rooted in the need for external validation rather than genuine creative expression. Miller asserts, 'A False self that has led to the loss of the potential True self' is a common ground between grandiosity and depression. This underscores the importance of recognizing and dismantling the False self to reconnect with one's True self.

-- Alice Miller