Plan B: Collaboration Replaces Control

Greene introduces a revolutionary alternative to traditional authority-based parenting through Plan B—a collaborative problem-solving approach that maintains parental leadership while building children's skills. Unlike Plan A (imposing adult solutions), Plan B involves three steps: the Empathy step (understanding the child's concerns), the Define Adult Concerns step (explaining why the expectation matters), and the Invitation step (collaborating on mutually satisfactory solutions). This isn't permissive parenting—it's strategic leadership. As Greene explains: 'You're going to feel a lot more in charge than you do now.' The parking lot example illustrates this beautifully: instead of forcing hand-holding, the parent discovers Chris feels treated 'like a baby' and they collaboratively find a solution (holding the belt loop) that addresses both safety concerns and the child's need for autonomy. Plan B transforms power struggles into skill-building opportunities.